Toilet Training Success!
Relax, toilet training HELP is here!
Toilet training. It’s one of those jobs we have to do and many of us dread it. We know it’s going to be messy, stinky and fraught with tears – ours and our child’s.
Or it can be a calm, straightforward process with clear goals and a simple strategy to get both you and your child to the desired outcome of a life without nappies.
A life without expensive wipes, nappy sacks and stinky dirty piles of used nappies. A cheaper life, a happier life for everyone in the family.
But where do you start? And when do you start?
With this easy-to-follow toilet training e-book guide you and your child will be on the road to a simple, nappy-free life in just three days.
Imagine the freedom that awaits you:
- no more expensive nappies
- no more costly wipes
- no more nappy sacks or plastic bags to wrap used nappies in
- no more gagging stench in the wheelie bin
- no more struggling to catch an active child and forcing them to submit to nappy changes
- no more heaving nappy bags laden with endless vital supplies
Instead you will have:
- more money
- more time
- a small, spare change of undies and shorts/skirt
that fit easily in your handbag - a happier, more independent child
- more freedom
All you need is a plan!
This toilet training e-book is that plan. With this e-guide you get:
- A simple plan that will toilet train your child in three days
- Clear instructions how to execute the plan (including what equipment you’ll need)
- What to do if your child doesn’t follow the plan
- Guidelines on how to adapt the plan for your child/family life
Toilet Training Boys
Toilet training boys is often thought to be different to toilet training girls. When approaching toilet training parents often talk about the differences between boys and girls. The established wisdom dictates that boys train slower and later than girls. But is this really true? And if so, how can we tailor our approach to toilet training to gain the best possible result – a gently trained child who doesn’t have any accidents?
There are a couple of reasons why it would seem that boys are often later to catch on. Firstly, in most cases mum is still the primary caregiver, which means same-sex modelling is limited. Boys don’t see dad going to the loo as often as girls see mum having a tinkle.
Secondly, it has been written (although I haven’t read it from any really reputable sources, such as a medical site) that boys physically mature later than girls, which delays their ability to regulate bowel and bladder.
From my own personal experience, toilet training two boys and a girl, the girl caught on much more quickly and earlier than the boys. All of my children were trained in around three or four days (for more on this check out my e-book Toilet Training Success!).
Once you begin, one of the most common areas where you may strike trouble with boys is doing poos. There’s a psychological element to it that they feel the poos are part of themselves and they are reluctant to let it go. This may lead to trying to hold it in.
Also, for boys actually sitting on a toilet may give rise to fears about falling in, or perhaps fears brought on by the sound of the splash (or the feel of the water as it splashes onto surprised little bottoms!).
So for these reasons, potties are the best place to start when training boys.
At the very start, in the first days, the best way to start is by having your son sit on the potty for both wees and poos.
Tips and Tricks Toilet Training Boys
If you really want them to poo on the toilet there are some tricks you can try that might help things along.
- A ping pong ball in the toilet can help with giving your son something to aim at. They can try to hit it with both wees and poos.
- Throw some lightweight things that float, either Cheerios (breakfast cereal) or those styrofoam packing beans, for your son to aim at.
- Put some toilet paper in the bowl to stop the sound and the splash when those poos hit.
For more help on toilet training consider my e-book Toilet Training Success! which is packed full of practical, helpful advice from a mother who’s been there and done that, three times!
Toilet Training Girls
As mentioned above, toilet training boys and girls can be a different experience. The accepted wisdom suggests that girls catch on faster, and that has certainly been my experience. My daughter exhibited the signs that she was ready to learn toileting techniques when she was around 14-15 months of age. My middle child didn’t really show the signs by the time I was ready to train him, so I went ahead anyway!
A few things to think about when toilet training girls – teaching them to wipe, teaching them to climb onto the toilet seat properly (a stool is a good tool to have in my view) and wearing skirts and dresses for speed and quick access to the toilet.
In the ’70s two psychologists, Nathan Azrin and Richard Foxx, devised their method of toilet training in less than a day, and wrote “Toilet Training In Less Than A Day“. I understand the method was originally created to help children with disabilities learn to toilet train. It relies on modelling with dolls and figurines and going through role play with the dolls. This would work particularly well with little girls who have favourite dolls.
Simply show the doll going through the motions of going to the toilet (Azrin and Foxx originally recommended the type of doll be one where you put a bottle of water in one end and the doll “wees” out the other end). As a teaching tool dolls can be quite effective so make sure you show pulling down pants, going to the loo, wiping her bottom, pulling up pants and washing hands (a very important function).
Just briefly, on the topic of wiping, when I started training Matilda I wasn’t confident her short arms could reach far enough to effectively wipe the correct region, so I would get her to do the initial wipe, to start her learning the habit, and then I would do a follow-up wipe. As she got older she got better at the wiping.
Girls in particular tend to be pleasers, so it’s important that you use positive reinforcement and positive rewards to induce complicit behaviour.
For more information please consider my e-book Toilet Training Success!
TOILET TRAINING OLDER CHILDREN
Toilet training older children is a slightly different kettle of fish for parents. This group of children comes with its own set of challenges and advantages. (“Older” children refers to anywhere from about four years of age onwards).
Older children have much better communication skills, which could lead a parent to think they will have a better chance at a straightforward toilet training process (ha!). Another advantage to older children is that we parents have got a better idea about what motivates them. We know exactly what things are considered “the best thing EVER” by our four-year-old children which means we have a better chance at finding rewards that matter to them. Peer group pressure is also starting to play a role in a four-year-old’s social development. Many four-year-olds want to do what their friends are doing, want to be like their friends and have what their friends have. This is a great thing for the toilet training parent.
On the flip-side, four-year-old children are master manipulators (even if you think they’re not, trust me, they’ve got a handle on what buttons to push). Four-year-olds are also newcomers to the world of control and independence. For many four year olds, stubborn barely begins to describe their personalities. They are learning that they can have some say in their own small world and they want to exercise this at every opportunity.
As parents, we can use these negatives to our advantage, especially when embarking on toilet training.
When toilet training a four year old, a few things that might help:
1. Role playing: as outlined in more detail in Toilet Training Success! role play can be used as a tool to teach children how to toilet themselves. Use a Barbie doll or better yet, one of those dolls that wee after you feed them a bottle. Using a doll that your child has an attachment to already will improve chances of success.
2. Make it fun. For boys, hitting objects in the toilet such as a ping pong ball or floating Cheerios rarely fails as a great motivator. They think it’s awesome fun! And this works for both wee and poo.
3. Peer pressure. Rope in friends or relatives who have children the same age. “Look Toby, James is wearing undies and he loves it, don’t you James?”. “Yes, I don’t wear nappies any more. Only my baby sister wears them now,” (says James).
4. Routine is king. As outlined in my e-book, Toilet Training Success! routine is key to toileting success for many children. This is true of two year olds, three year olds and four year olds. The method outlined in my book will work just as well for any child no matter what the age.
